Ways to Stay Sane when the Unimaginable Strikes Out of the Blue – Step 8

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AS THE SPIRIT GROWS – “Some things we must accept, others we can change. The wisdom to know the difference comes with growth in our spiritual program.” “This is the emotional stability that we so baldly need.”(The Basic Text, p. 95)

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What wise revelations have you experienced lately and did they occur thru reflection or experience?

OR

When something painful happens suddenly, how can you tell if you’re growing or just reacting to the hurt?

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Analysis

The passages from The Basic Text (p. 95) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (p. 116) illuminate emotional stability as a spiritual practice, not a passive gift. Growth emerges when acceptance and courage balance each other. Viktor Frankl (1946/2006) wrote in Man’s Search for Meaning that suffering loses power when it finds purpose. Likewise, Wellbriety: Journey to Forgiveness reminds us that “healing means changing how we think about our pain” (Coyhis, 2006). This truth calls us to action through awareness, not avoidance.

Furthermore, Confucius taught that wisdom develops through reflection, imitation, and experience. Reflection aligns with Step Eight’s self-inventory, where honesty replaces illusion. Experience becomes our teacher when calamity strikes “out of the blue.” Imitation follows when we practice the humility and courage modeled by those walking before us. Each method refines stability and nurtures faith.

However, false pride resists this growth. It clings to self-will and denies guidance from a Higher Power. As humility grows, emotional steadiness deepens. Reinhold Niebuhr’s serenity prayer, though not cited directly, echoes this dynamic balance—acceptance for what cannot change and courage for what can. Thus, serenity becomes not escape but resilience, anchored in awareness.

Through this lens, Step Eight becomes a bridge between awareness and compassion. Pain teaches patience; humility opens peace; growth sustains faith.


Traducción al español

Cómo no perder la cordura cuando lo inimaginable sucede — Paso 8

A MEDIDA QUE EL ESPÍRITU CRECE
“Algunas cosas debemos aceptar, otras podemos cambiar. La sabiduría para conocer la diferencia llega con el crecimiento en nuestro programa espiritual.” “Esta es la estabilidad emocional que tanto necesitamos.” (The Basic Text, p. 95)

LA ESTABILIDAD, LA FE Y LA SABIDURÍA FLORECEN
“… [D]escubrimos que la mejor fuente posible de estabilidad emocional era Dios [o nuestro P.S.].” “Estas fueron las nuevas actitudes que finalmente trajeron a muchos de nosotros una fuerza interior y una paz que no podían ser profundamente sacudidas por las faltas de otros o por cualquier calamidad que no fuera de nuestra propia creación.” (12 & 12, p. 116)

“Por tres métodos podemos aprender sabiduría: primero, por reflexión, que es lo más noble; segundo, por imitación, que es lo más fácil; y tercero, por experiencia, que es lo más amarga.”
— Confucio (551 a.C. – 479 a.C.), filósofo chino

Análisis (243 palabras)

Los pasajes de The Basic Text (p. 95) y 12 & 12 (p. 116) muestran la estabilidad emocional como práctica espiritual, no como don pasivo. El crecimiento surge cuando la aceptación y el valor se equilibran. Viktor Frankl (1946/2006) escribió en El hombre en busca de sentido que el sufrimiento pierde poder cuando encuentra propósito. Asimismo, Wellbriety: Journey to Forgiveness recuerda que “sanar significa cambiar cómo pensamos sobre nuestro dolor” (Coyhis, 2006). Esta verdad nos llama a la acción mediante la conciencia, no la evasión.

Además, Confucio enseñó que la sabiduría se desarrolla por reflexión, imitación y experiencia. La reflexión se alinea con el Paso Ocho, donde la honestidad reemplaza la ilusión. La experiencia se vuelve maestra cuando la calamidad llega “de la nada”. Y la imitación sigue cuando practicamos la humildad y el valor de quienes nos precedieron. Cada método refina la estabilidad y nutre la fe.

Sin embargo, el falso orgullo resiste este crecimiento. Se aferra al auto-control y niega la guía de un Poder Superior. A medida que crece la humildad, la estabilidad emocional se profundiza. La serenidad, como enseñó Niebuhr, no es escape sino resiliencia, anclada en la conciencia.

Pregunta:
Cuando algo doloroso sucede de repente, ¿cómo sabes si estás creciendo o solo reaccionando al dolor?

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Comments

5 responses to “Ways to Stay Sane when the Unimaginable Strikes Out of the Blue – Step 8”

  1. E-Dawg Avatar
    E-Dawg

    I would say my wise revelation recently has happened through experience. Before my house burned down in the Eaton Canyon fire I thought I had it all under control. All my material things were placed in certain areas of my home never to be changed…I had a tool room, memorabilia hanging strategically on the walls of my living room,a, couch and an antique dresser positioned in a certain way, and three guitars on stands, and four guitars hanging on the wall never to be moved except when playing them. I understand that things happen Beyond My Control… but this is a test of real faith. The revelation of comfort that he gives me in the time of need is so overwhelming I can’t explain it. I just know it to be true that he is living in my heart. To honestly know that he is with me without a shadow of a doubt is truly a revelation.

  2. Ari L Avatar
    Ari L

    I think it’s a matter of patience and self awareness when moments of conflict arise and pain happens. Not reacting to it initially but instead responding to the situation after taking a moment. I think there is a major difference: have we considered our actions and genuinely thought about our response to the situation? If so I think we are growing

  3. Neyun Uzdlah Bayoh Avatar
    Neyun Uzdlah Bayoh

    When something painful happens suddenly, how can you tell if you’re growing or just reacting to the hurt? ~

    It’s both, self reflections shows me I’m growing, because I’m letting myself feel everything finally, I’m not numbing, even if it hurts . So if my reaction is tears, and maybe needed to reach out for emotional support, or maybe helping someone else struggling, it is an amazing thing to feel everything and see my growth as i grow along, and continue to feel without the comfort of momentary reliefs with false fixes ~

  4. Sabrina J Avatar
    Sabrina J

    Prayer. When I have built an expectation that does not come to bare, it becomes a dangerous time to not build up a resentment. Rather to turn it over to prayer and self reflection. By letting my higher power guide me through the pain the hurt becomes growth. As even more healing occurs, the ability to recognize the rise of expectations will allow them to not be created in the first place. That is something I am still working on today. The building of these skills is not linear, nor does this work finish in this earthly life. It is a skill that keeps building each time that in awareness is used.

    Thank you for sharing recovery with me. Grateful.

  5. Elexi W.S.A. Avatar

    I’ve had wise revelations lately regardin’ feeling like I’m finally overcomin’ one jinxed hurdle after another to branch out into new horizons with meetings, and new found controls. This could easily make some seriously jealous who are no longer serious about overcomin’ any obstacles, but someone wise may see controlled behavior even despite setbacks due to people’s lapses right now as beneficial. False esteem isn’t where it is, but rather lived productive behaviors are the wisest to me, and forthcoming. Since I’ve experienced great tragedies I’m less scared of a lot of things, but have to still use safety procedures, and that should make for a good guard though, with my guard card I recently obtained for any who still care about employment matters. Lookin’ like a lived experienced observational candidate for employment is of great importance to me right now to become more, and more responsible plus disciplined. To let the mind slip with a meditative Buddha outside, no matter, would be of great spiritual karmic concerns for me right now in my right mind.

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