“When you meet someone better than yourself, turn your thoughts to becoming his equal. When you meet someone not as good as you are, look within and examine your own self.”
– Confucius (551 ~ 479 BC) Chinese philosopher
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What do you think Confucius meant by “someone better”?
OR
Why is it important to look inside yourself before trying to change your life?
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Work – Rihanna ft. Drake (7:34)
Changing Your Life to be Better (w/ Wavey Davey) (2:01)
Sikh Willingness to Surrender Meditation – Aakhan Jor by Kaur (7:36)
Today’s SFZ focuses on personal willingness, internal change, and spiritual growth. It urges individuals to look inward and take responsibility for their own transformation.
Step Three asks us to turn our will and lives over to a Higher Power. Bill W., co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, emphasizes that this begins with willingness. In Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, he explains that willingness is something only the individual can build. Psychologist Carl Rogers supports this view. He believed change starts with honest self-acceptance. Without that, growth becomes impossible.
The next piece is courage. As It Works: How and Why states, we must reaffirm our decision daily. Change doesn’t happen all at once. Brené Brown, an expert on vulnerability and courage, agrees. She says courage means showing up and acting even when afraid.
Confucius offers another timeless insight. When we compare ourselves to others, we shouldn’t judge. Instead, we should reflect. That reflection leads to humility, not pride. Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, wrote that between stimulus and response is a space. In that space, we have the power to choose. Step Three lives in that space—where we choose trust over control.
The authors quoted agree: growth begins within. Real change is not about fixing the outside world. It’s about surrendering, examining ourselves, and choosing to act differently.
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