“I said that I was strong,
but that was just a lie.
Outside I may seem calm,
But inside I do cry.” – excerpt from Perceptions, by Mandy Lee
Today’s SFZ
How have perceptions that you once held about your own spiritual journey changed, lately?
The Magic of Ansel Adams (2:12)
Nature’s Niagra Falls Piano Mediation (6:33) – dedicated to the memory of First Lady, Betty Ford, founder of the Betty Ford Center for Alcohol and Drug abuse, who died today, 7/8/2011 at the age of 93.
Perception
– by Mandy Lee
I said that I was strong,
but that was just a lie.
Outside I may seem calm,
But inside I do cry.
You just never noticed it,
none of you really did.
This internal conflict
of myself, I could not rid.
You think I’m untouchable,
but is that really so?
In fact, I’m lower than you think,
it’s a yes but you’d say no.
You never got to know me,
for I was too afraid.
Of being so-called happy,
and then broken and unmade.
I’m sorry I have to do this,
but old habits are hard to change.
To be hurt and have to cry,
to me, they aren’t that strange.
Recognizing that feelings aren’t facts has helped me more quickly recognize my faulty thinking. The last couple days I was in a pissy mood. I was choosing to be in a pissy mood as a result of me not getting something I wanted. The fact I didn’t get what I wanted is a fact, but that negative feeling is not a fact and I don’t have to hold on to it.
Thank you Betty Ford for having courage and being a trail blazer. The video made me cry and cry – the force of nature and waterfall like did some inner purging; and the clear blue sky to show everything will be okay. Great to know I am not responsible for making sure the world spins around – this video really put my HP back in charge. Thank you SFZ.
I’m somewhat partial to the Boy George video. He’s his own creation and a trailblazer in his own rite. I have to think that Boy and Betty would have been fast friends if they met.