“It belongs to the imperfection of everything human that man can only attain his desire by passing through its opposite.” – Soren Kierkegaard (1813 – 1855) Danish philosopher (on contrary action)
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THE BEAUTY OF ‘CONTRARY ACTION’ -“For without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all.” “Without it, they cannot live to much useful purpose, or, in adversity, be able to summon the faith that can meet any emergency.” (12 & 12 p. 70)
Survivor – Destiny’s Child (4:17)
Kierkegaard on Life & Love (5:25)
Taking Aligned Action Meditation (15:17)
How has your own new sense of humility enabled you to achieve some small successes, lately?
How to Take Contrary Action
There are of course a ton of ways we can practice this in our lives. We have so many opportunities to do things we don’t want to do. You can investigate for yourself where contrary action is beneficial and where you have room to grow. Here are a few places we’ve found great opportunity in our own paths to recovery.
Steering Clear of Using
This is rather obvious perhaps, but bears repeating. Especially in early recovery, we may find ourselves experiencing moments of intense cravings for drugs or alcohol. Instead of picking up and using, utilize this opportunity to strengthen your recovery, retrain the mind, and try something new! Call a sponsor or mentor, talk to staff at your treatment center or sober living, or tell a friend. When we take action like this we are building new habits, making it easier to do so in the future. Not only do we stay sober in the moment, we build a foundation for a future clean life.
Being of Service
We don’t always tend toward being of service. We think we don’t have time, we believe that we don’t have anything to offer, or we are too shy to take action. You can start small with being of service. Hold the door open for somebody, smile at a stranger, or put your own chair away at the end of a meeting. When you take contrary action and are of service to someone around you, you have the opportunity to get out of yourself and connect with those around you. Being of service helps build compassion, has been shown to increase psychological well-being, and offers us the chance to be a part of the community we’re in.
The “Little” Opportunities
We have so many opportunities throughout our days to practice contrary action. These “little” things are not really little at all. When we take healthy actions, we are more likely to take further healthy actions. Try making your bed, doing your dishes right away, getting some exercise, and taking care of yourself. When you have a thought of doing something healthy like getting to bed early or going to a meeting, don’t just let the thought go. Take action on that thought. You may notice that you have a lot of thoughts about doing good things, but don’t follow through with all of them. Take contrary action and actually act upon those intentions!
Whatever way you go about it, we encourage you to investigate contrary action in your own life! It takes time and patience, as we can’t change our habits overnight. We do, however, have the power to start today in building new habits. (https://changingtidesaddictiontreatment.com/contrary/)
