You are currently viewing Self-Acceptance Frees us to Follow our Dreams & Allow Others to do the Same – Step 9

Self-Acceptance Frees us to Follow our Dreams & Allow Others to do the Same – Step 9

“Throw your dreams into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country.” – Anais Nin (1903 – 1977) U.S. novelist (on self-acceptance)

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LIVE & LET LIVE – “It can be a great struggle to grant others the dignity to make decisions for themselves.”  “Regardless of what they choose to do about it, by minding our own business and getting  out  of the way, we allow others to be themselves.” (How Al Anon Works, p. 74)

FREED BY SELF-ACCEPTANCE SO OUR DREAMS CAN TAKE FLIGHT –  “We no longer have to be right all the time. When we give ourselves this freedom, we can allow others to be wrong. Freedom to change seems to come after acceptance of ourselves.”  (The Basic Text, p. 58)

Henry Miller & Anais Nin – Henry & June set in Paris (1:31) 

Self-Esteem Guided Meditation (9:39)

 How have you allowed others the freedom to make choices you felt were wrong, lately?

The Boy and The Apple Tree :

A long time ago, there was a huge apple tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it everyday. He climbed to the treetop, ate the apples and took a nap under the shadow. He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him. Time went by. The little boy had grown up and he now longer played around the tree every day.

One day the boy came back to the tree and he looked sad. ‘Come and play with me”, the tree asked the boy.

“I am no longer a kid. I do not play around trees any more,” the boy replied.

“[I] want toys. I need money to buy them.”

‘Sorry….but I do not have money, but you can pick all my apples and sell them. So, you will have money.”

The boy was so excited. He grabbed all the apples on the tree and left happily. The boy never came back after he picked the apples.

The tree was sad.

One day the boy who now turned into a man returned and the tree was excited.

‘Come and play with me’ the tree said.

“I do not have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?’

‘Sorry…. but I do not have any house. But you can chop off my branches to build your house.”

‘So the man cut all the branches of the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the man never came back since then. The tree was again lonely and sad.

One hot summer day, the man returned and the tree was delighted.

‘Come and play with me!’ the tree said.

I am getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself, can you give me a boat?’ said the man.

“Use my trunk to build your boat. You can sail far away and be happy.”

So the man cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and never showed up for a long time.

Finally, the man returned after many years. ‘Sorry, my boy. But I do not have anything for you anymore. No more apples for you’, the tree said.

“[N]o problem, I do not have any teeth to bite’ the man replied.

‘No more trunk for you to climb on.” ‘I am too old for that now.” The man said.

“I really cannot give yon anything, the only thing left is my dying roots,’ the tree said with tears.

“I do not need much now, just a place to rest. [I] am tired after all these years,’ the man replied.

‘Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest come sit down with me and rest.’

The man sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears.

This is a story of everyone. The tree is like our parents. When we were young, we loved to play with our Mum and Dad. When we grow up, we leave them… only come to them when we need something or when we are in trouble. No matter what, parents will always be there and give everything they could just to make you happy.

You may think the boy is cruel to the tree, but that is how all of us treat our parents. We take them for granted. We don’t appreciate all they do for us, until it’s too late.

Zonr pod on self-obsession

This Post Has 5 Comments

  1. Kelli

    I have lots of housemates and I’ve had to step back, mind my own business, and let those closest to me grow from their own decisions and mistakes and progress.

  2. JB jr.

    Despite my sincere misgivings I’m asking my elderly mother’s doctor to meet with her to discuss surgical option he himself feel are not necessary and do have significant risks.

  3. easy does it

    not having expectations of others frees me to allow others the dignity to be themselves..

  4. JB jr.

    I’m surprised at how genuinely sweet Depeche Mode appears as they first started out. Like any other rock band without all the glam and glitter they adopted in later years.

    The song, New Life, has that feeling of life just beginning with hope and promise overflowing.

  5. brita

    Depeche Mode! This reminds me “we are not a glum lot”. Thanks SFZ and all contributors – I learn SO MUCH from everyones comments! HAVE A GREAT DAY!

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