When You Simply Can’t Take It Anymore, Rise Up to say “Hands Off” and … -Step 1

4 yo brothers running holding hands toward ocean waves

“A friend should be one in whose understanding and virtue we can equally confide, and whose opinion we can value at once for its justness and its sincerity.” – Robert Hall (1764 – 1831) British clergyman (on friendships  w/ an addict)

– Sign up to Zonr for Today’s Full SFZ

~~~

What qualities do you look for before sharing your most intimate experiences, lately?

~~~

 Climb Every Mountain – Shirley Bassey (6:02) 

 Alan Watts’ Guided Meditation (14:48)

The Addict

by Anne Sexton

Sleepmonger,
deathmonger,
with capsules in my palms each night,
eight at a time from sweet pharmaceutical bottles
I make arrangements for a pint-sized journey.
I’m the queen of this condition.
I’m an expert on making the trip
and now they say I’m an addict.
Now they ask why.
WHY!

Don’t they know that I promised to die!
I’m keping in practice.
I’m merely staying in shape.
The pills are a mother, but better,
every color and as good as sour balls.
I’m on a diet from death.

Yes, I admit
it has gotten to be a bit of a habit-
blows eight at a time, socked in the eye,
hauled away by the pink, the orange,
the green and the white goodnights.
I’m becoming something of a chemical
mixture.

that’s it!

My supply
of tablets
has got to last for years and years.
I like them more than I like me.
It’s a kind of marriage.
It’s a kind of war where I plant bombs inside
of myself.

Yes
I try
to kill myself in small amounts,
an innocuous occupatin.
Actually I’m hung up on it.
But remember I don’t make too much noise.
And frankly no one has to lug me out
and I don’t stand there in my winding sheet.
I’m a little buttercup in my yellow nightie
eating my eight loaves in a row
and in a certain order as in
the laying on of hands
or the black sacrament.

It’s a ceremony
but like any other sport
it’s full of rules.
It’s like a musical tennis match where
my mouth keeps catching the ball.
Then I lie on; my altar
elevated by the eight chemical kisses.

What a lay me down this is
with two pink, two orange,
two green, two white goodnights.
Fee-fi-fo-fum-
Now I’m borrowed.
Now I’m numb.

Mobile Recovery Spiritual Solutions You Can Count ON!

Zonr logo white lives

Comments

2 responses to “When You Simply Can’t Take It Anymore, Rise Up to say “Hands Off” and … -Step 1”

  1. Sabrina Avatar
    Sabrina

    While searching for a sponsor, I needed to find someone that has certain shared experiences and supported me where I am at. Not judgemental or pushy toward the theme of “What’s your part in all this, you are to blame”. The reason behind that is there is no person on this planet that is harder on me, than I am. I beat myself up constantly.

    In the search for being vulnerable, my goal was to find someone with serious common ground. Someone who also is a high performer, high achiever and yet relentlessly self critical and would turn that around as compassion to others. Hard on oneself, gentle on others.

    By being honest with myself about my needs, by being picky and not just going for the first, second or third person that raised their hand saying, hey I’ll be your sponsor, I found the right person.

    She continues to mirror who I am and in our shared self criticism. We both lift each other up and be that kind supportive friend that sees how our own self critique is a bit over the top and instead we reassure each other that we are okay, we are making progress and we are healing.

    Everyone needs what they need. And we do not all see things the same. Being self aware, desperately honest and rigorous in a desire to heal, we do, we can and we will.

    Sometimes, often, I can’t, however we can.

    Yes, we can.

  2. Miss Chi Chi Avatar
    Miss Chi Chi

    Qualities in my friends are many but most importantly their not judgmental and that allows me to be more open with them and that’s Respect…..

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.