Even if We Try to Pray it Away … Sex Lurks in the Undertow – Step 4

Mermaid floating toward the top of a deep blue sea w/ sfz title

“Yet, as with other addictions and compulsions, the costs are great. In this case, sex becomes a furtive enemy to be continually kept at bay, even at the price of annihilating a part of oneself.” (Sexual Anorexia, p. 1)

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How have any of your past sex relations caused you to feel shame due to “manipulation, ego, lust or false pride”?

OR

What helps you feel thankful for what you already have?

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Just Can’t Get Enough (The Saturdays)

Sex Shame Can Hurt You More Than You Think

 *Tiesto- Kaleidoscope

Rainforest Nature Meditation LP (8:04:03)

Sigmund Freud would argue that repressed desires resurface despite moral resistance. Freud’s Civilization and Its Discontents explains this conflict. We chase purity yet find ourselves tangled in instinct. Carl Jung might add that our shadow selves hold these urges. Jung’s Man and His Symbols shows our hidden needs demand attention.

The Inferiority Complex passage reveals a childlike craving for validation. Alfred Adler’s work on inferiority shines here. In Understanding Human Nature, Adler claims feelings of inferiority drive ambition. This person “cries for the moon.” The moon becomes a symbol for unreachable perfection. Their sensibility remains childish, so the hunger grows unchecked.

Yet gratitude shifts this dynamic. The Galaxy of Gifts quote shows recovery’s power. Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning argues that gratitude anchors us to purpose. Instead of chasing the moon, we cherish the stars. Now, Voyager echoes this truth. Bette Davis’s line, “We have the stars,” reminds us: abundance already surrounds us.

Desire, inferiority, and gratitude form a cycle. We crave what lies out of reach. We feel small when we fail. But we heal when we stand in gratitude. These ideas unite Freud’s instincts, Adler’s inferiority, and Frankl’s search for meaning. When we accept our limits, we gain the stars.


Translations of the quotes into Spanish

Aunque intentemos rezar para alejarlo… el sexo acecha en la resaca — Paso 4

Este sentimiento muy real de inferioridad se magnifica por su sensibilidad infantil y es este estado de cosas el que genera en él ese deseo insaciable y anormal de aprobación propia y éxito a los ojos del mundo. Sigue siendo un niño que llora por la luna. ¡Y parece que la luna no lo quiere! (Language of the Heart, p. 102)

Con gratitud, agarramos la galaxia de regalos a nuestros pies —
En el pasado, creíamos que la desesperación nos daría la fuerza para sobrevivir. Ahora aceptamos la responsabilidad de nuestros problemas y vemos que somos igualmente responsables de nuestras soluciones. Como adictos en recuperación, llegamos a conocer la gratitud. (The Basic Text, p. 97)

—Oh Jerry, no pidamos la luna. Tenemos las estrellas.
(Now Voyager, protagonizada por Bette Davis)


Translation of the analysis and question in Spanish

El deseo acecha bajo nuestras oraciones en Sex Lurks in the Undertow. Sigmund Freud diría que los deseos reprimidos resurgen pese a la resistencia moral. En Civilization and Its Discontents, Freud explica este conflicto. Perseguimos la pureza pero caemos en instinto. Carl Jung añadiría que nuestro “lado sombra” guarda estos impulsos. En Man and His Symbols, Jung muestra cómo estas necesidades ocultas exigen atención.

El pasaje de Inferiority Complex revela un anhelo infantil de validación. El trabajo de Alfred Adler sobre la inferioridad ilumina esto. En Understanding Human Nature, Adler afirma que los sentimientos de inferioridad impulsan la ambición. Esta persona “llora por la luna”. La luna simboliza la perfección inalcanzable. Su sensibilidad sigue siendo infantil, así que el hambre crece sin control.

Sin embargo, la gratitud cambia esta dinámica. La cita de Galaxy of Gifts muestra el poder de la recuperación. Viktor Frankl, en Man’s Search for Meaning, sostiene que la gratitud nos ancla al propósito. En lugar de perseguir la luna, valoramos las estrellas. Now, Voyager refleja esta verdad. La frase de Bette Davis, “Tenemos las estrellas”, nos recuerda: la abundancia nos rodea ya.

Deseo, inferioridad y gratitud forman un ciclo. Anhelamos lo inalcanzable. Nos sentimos pequeños cuando fallamos. Sanamos cuando vivimos con gratitud. Estas ideas unen los instintos de Freud, la inferioridad de Adler y la búsqueda de sentido de Frankl. Al aceptar nuestros límites, ganamos las estrellas.

¿Qué te ayuda a sentirte agradecido por lo que ya tienes?

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Comments

5 responses to “Even if We Try to Pray it Away … Sex Lurks in the Undertow – Step 4”

  1. Sabrina J Avatar
    Sabrina J

    Willie Nelson said his life changed when he became grateful for everything he had. The has stuck with me since the first day I read it. It is a mantra that I try to practice daily. I am grateful for everything I have. While admitedly there have been times lately when I may aspire for more, I try not to turn aspirations into Lust. One of the tools I use for this is my higher power. Faith and trust that everything is as it should be and everything will be as it is supposed to become.

    Thank you for sharing in recovery. Grateful.

  2. Br. Buddha Avatar
    Br. Buddha

    Good morning everyone + happy Tuesday. Here is today’s thought. Give today your very best shot. Blessings. BB

  3. Adam Avatar
    Adam

    I still feel shame about my past, but nothing lately. But I will be doing my inventory so I will be able to start dealing with it.

  4. Margot E. Avatar
    Margot E.

    When I pursued sex it was to feed my inner need for intimacy. Today I know there are at least six types of intimacy and only one of them is sexual: physical, non-sexual intimacy, emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, financial intimacy, spiritual intimacy, and finally sexual intimacy. Intimacy requires my being trusting and trustworthy. Intimacy requires truth in communication. Intimacy requires conscious, mindful participation. Tall order!

  5. Adam Avatar
    Adam

    I can’t think of anything lately. Throughout my drinking life, my lust and alcoholism combined to do things I was ashamed of. I’m sure I’ve hurt people, but lucky for them and I, I never manipulated or caused anyone serious harm.

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