“If you want to be respected by others the great thing is to respect yourself. Only by that, only by self-respect will you compel others to respect you.”

– Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 – 1881) Russian novelist – author of Crime & Punishment

BEING RESPECTED FOR SELF-RESPECT – “Our recovery is also a way of making amends to ourselves.  We treated ourselves horribly in our active addiction. The guilt and shame we felt each time we harmed another human being took quite a toll on our self-respect. Our addiction humiliated us in a thousand different ways.” (It Works, How & Why, p. 67)

How successful have you been in earning the respect of others, lately? 

A Father learns A Lesson from His Son

Velan was a carpenter. He was living in a village. His mother dies a long time back. His aged father, Kuppan, lived with Velan. Kuppan was very weak. He could not even walk well. He was so weak. It was because Velan did not give him enough food. He had given his father a small earthen plate. Even a small quantity of rice in the plate appeared to be much. Velan was a bad man. He was a drunkard also. After taking drinks, he abused his father badly.

Velan had a son. His name is Muthu. Muthu was just ten years old. [A] very good boy.  He loved his grandfather. [H]ad great respect for his grandfather. He did not like his father’s attitude and character, because his father was treating his grandfather cruelly.

One day Kuppan was eating his food out of earthen plate that his son had given to him. The earthen plate fell down. The plate broke into pieces. The food also fell on the floor. Velan was working at the other end of the room. He saw the broken plate. He was very angry with his father and used very harsh words to abuse his father. The old man felt bad about what happened. He was sorry for his mistake. Velan’s words wounded him very deeply.

…

Velan’s son, Muthu, saw this. He did not like his father. His father was ill-treating his grandfather. He was afraid to speak against his father. He was sad about his grandfather. But he was not powerful to stand in support of his grandfather.

The next day Muthu took some of his father’s carpentry tools and a piece of wood. He worked with the tools to make a wooden plate. His father saw him working.

“What are you making, Muthu?” he asked.

“I am making a wooden plate!” replied Muthu.

“A wooden plate! What for?” asked his father.

“I am making it for you, father. When you grow old, like my grandfather, you will need a plate for food. A plate made from earth mat break very easily. Then I may scold you severely. So, I want to give you a wooden plate. It may not break so easily.”

The carpenter was shocked to hear this. Only now he realized his mistake. His father was kind to Velan He had looked after Velan very well. Now, he was old. Velan was treating his father severely. Velan was now very sad about his own behavior. He realized his mistakes. He then became a different person.

From that day, Velan treated his father with great respect. He gave up drinking too. Velan learnt a lesson from his own son.

You should honor your parents at all times. It is your duty. It brings you their blessings.  (http://www.english-for-students.com/A-Father-learns-A-Lesson-from-His-Son.html)