CONDUCTED IN “A SPIRIT OF SELF-LOVE & HEALING” – “Usually there is one person whom we have inflicted the greatest damage – ourselves.” “So … most of us need to write our own name.” “… [U]ntil we can take this Step in a spirit of self-love and healing, we may not be ready for it.” (How Al Anon Works, pp. 58- 59 on being harmed)
THE HARM WE HOLD INSIDE – “Many of us had trouble seeing how we had harmed ourselves … .” “Some of us have had a tendency to deny any responsibility, while others have taken on total blame for every disagreement. As we talk with our sponsor and other addicts, our flawed perceptions begin to fall away and we find the clarity we need … .” (It Works, How & Why, pp. 56 – 57)
“Holding anger is a poison. It eats you from inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harms we do, we do to ourselves.”
Mitch Albom (1958 – ) U.S. spiritual author of Tuesdays with Morrie
What Does the Fox Say – Dear Ryan (2:28)
Quotes from the novel -Tuesdays w/ Morrie (3:40)
The Indigenous People of America (41:18)
In what ways have you caused ‘self-inflicted wounds’, lately?
Aesop’s Fables : Fox in Cart
A fox, observing a fish cart coming, lay down and pretended to be dead.
The cart man, tempted by the idea of making some money by selling the fox’s fur, picked up the animal by its tail and flung it into the back of the cart among the fish.
Then he resumed his journey. The fox ate his fill of the fish and jumped out of the cart.
A wolf saw him jumping out and asked him what he had been doing in it. The fox told him and also how he had got into it in the first place.
The wolf ran ahead of the cart and lay down in its path, pretending to be dead.
The cart man was delighted to find another animal to sell, but he found the animal too heavy to lift.
So he pushed it into a sack, tied the sack to his cart and dragged it away.
For me, I think I’ve been in closet in family gatherings and at work. That’s a huge disservice to me and gives those that would bully me fuel. That’s something I’m actively addressing now in all areas of my life.
I can relate with Margot, not thinking good things can come to me. whether its love, material things, or a good career, deep down I think for some reason I dont deserve them.. I guess I will figure that out when I go over this step with my sponsor.
Whoa! Making amends to myself (and everyone else) requires seeing and acknowledging the harm I have done. I do not come to this Step unscathed, but only some of the self-harm is apparent. I know I neglected my physical self but the emotional and spiritual harm are far deeper issues. Good and wonderful things have happened in my life and they have gone unacknowledged as I lived in fear of an offsetting bad thing that must balance it. Surely, I felt, good things cannot come to such an unworthy person as myself.