Take a Deep Breath cuz “The Number One Offender” is on Its Way – Step 4

Sperm Whale and Freediver w/ sfz title

Written by

in

,

“Holding on to anger, resentment, and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache, and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth.”

– Joan Lunden (1950 – ) U.S. television personality

~~~

Sign up to get Zonr for Today’s Full SFZ

Why is resentment the “number one offender” according to today’s SFZ?

OR

Is there anyone you need to forgive so you can feel happier today?

~~~

Resentment – Beyonce (6:40)

Releasing Anger (7:02)

Tranquility Sounds of the Nature Meditation LP (42:39)

Analysis: Healing the Resentment Wound

Resentment poisons the soul. The Big Book identifies it as the primary offender. It causes deep spiritual illness. We lose our peace when we harbor hostility. A Higher Power offers a remedy. Forgiveness cleanses the heavy heart.

Self-reflection uncovers these hidden burdens. It Works: How and Why suggests listing every grievance. We must not stay obsessed with past slights. This list helps us regain our freedom. We release the weight of old anger. Each name on the page loses its sting.

Joan Lunden highlights the physical cost of holding on. Tight muscles and tension follow suppressed rage. Buddha also taught that anger punishes the bearer (Buddha, n.d.). We choose healing over suffering today. Wellbriety wisdom supports this path toward release. “We let go of the past to embrace today” (White Bison, 2002, p. 45). Letting go invites laughter back into our lives. We walk forward with a lighter spirit.

References

Buddha. (n.d.). The Dhammapada. (J. Mascaró, Trans.). Penguin Classics.

White Bison. (2002). The Red Road to Wellbriety. White Bison, Inc.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Traducción al Español

Citas, Títulos y Referencias

RESPIRA PROFUNDO PORQUE “EL OFENSOR NÚMERO UNO” ESTÁ EN CAMINO – PASO 4

LA CAUSA DE LA ENFERMEDAD ESPIRITUAL –

“El resentimiento es el ‘ofensor número uno’. Destruye a más alcohólicos que cualquier otra cosa. De él provienen todas las formas de enfermedad espiritual, porque no solo hemos estado enfermos mental y físicamente, hemos estado espiritualmente enfermos.” (El Libro Grande, p. 64)

HACER UNA LISTA –

“Hacemos una lista de nuestros resentimientos, ya que a menudo juegan un papel importante en hacer que nuestra recuperación sea incómoda. No podemos permitirnos estar obsesionados con la hostilidad hacia los demás.” (Funciona: Cómo y Por Qué, p. 30)

JOAN LUNDEN –

“Aferrarse a la ira, el resentimiento y el dolor solo te da músculos tensos, dolor de cabeza y mandíbula adolorida por apretar los dientes. El perdón te devuelve la risa y la ligereza a tu vida.”

Joan Lunden (1950 – )

Análisis

El resentimiento envenena el alma. El Libro Grande lo identifica como el ofensor principal. Causa una profunda enfermedad espiritual. Perdemos nuestra paz cuando albergamos hostilidad. Un Poder Superior ofrece un remedio. El perdón limpia el corazón pesado.

La autorreflexión descubre estas cargas ocultas. Funciona: Cómo y Por Qué sugiere listar cada agravio. No debemos obsesionarnos con ofensas pasadas. Esta lista nos ayuda a recuperar nuestra libertad. Soltamos el peso de la vieja ira. Cada nombre en la página pierde su aguijón.

Joan Lunden destaca el costo físico de aferrarse. Músculos tensos y tensión siguen a la rabia reprimida. Buda también enseñó que la ira castiga a quien la siente (Buda, s.f.). Elegimos la sanación sobre el sufrimiento hoy. La sabiduría de Wellbriety apoya este camino hacia la liberación. “Dejamos ir el pasado para abrazar el hoy” (White Bison, 2002, p. 45). Soltar invita la risa de vuelta a nuestras vidas. Caminamos hacia adelante con un espíritu más ligero.

Pregunta Concluyente

¿Hay alguien a quien necesites perdonar para que puedas sentirte más feliz hoy?


Mobile Recovery Solutions You Can Count ON!

Zonr pod on resentment

 

Comments

17 responses to “Take a Deep Breath cuz “The Number One Offender” is on Its Way – Step 4”

  1. VLeigh Avatar
    VLeigh

    I still need to forgive my mom for some of the harm she has caused by not trying to understand my disease as well as my dad has tried.

  2. Eli Avatar
    Eli

    Resentment is common and human- it’s not ‘wrong’ to feel resentment, and the feeling comes up for me over even the most trivial things. Personally, I consciously find and acknowledge the person/place/thing that disturbs me, my part in the interaction(s), and how I can remedy the situation internally and externally. That can mean meditation on a solution, just talking to the resented person, talking to other AA’s about the situation, etc etc.

  3. Phil d Avatar
    Phil d

    The main resentment I have that keeps recurring is of myself and the things I’ve done in the past. I need to learn how to forgive myself because it keeps me from being in the moment.

  4. Mink Avatar
    Mink

    I think that I can find a way to forgive anyone who may wrong me. Forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing their behavior or letting them back into my life or liking them again, it just means letting go of the resentment.

  5. Sabrina J Avatar
    Sabrina J

    Resentments fester and build up over time. Carrying them only hurts the person who has the resentment.

  6. E-Dawg Avatar
    E-Dawg

    Resentments can cause physical and emotional problems. They can make us anxious and unable to focus on anything else… resentments rarely change the person whom we resent. They almost never resolve conflicts…

  7. Ari L Avatar
    Ari L

    Having resentment is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to be hurt by it. At least, I’m paraphrasing a quote I’ve heard before in the rooms, and that has given me the most perspective about it personally.

  8. E-Dawg Avatar
    E-Dawg

    It is absolutely the silent killer. It’s just another excuse to go out and just say F that person. If I don’t talk to my sponsor about it or if I don’t write about it it becomes a pressure cooker. If it’s a personal issue I’ll take it directly to that person to figure out a solution. If that does not work that is precisely where the steps come in…

  9. Sabrina J Avatar
    Sabrina J

    Resentments dig in deep and become forgotten until poked. Letting them go is a process of healing, on top of healing,with more continued healing. They start with Expectations, and then turn into resentments. For me, I like to scan my body and discover where I am holding on, where I am tight. And I like to say a prayer, God help me release this resentment to the light amen.

    Thank you for sharing my recovery. I am Grateful.

  10. Jim Avatar
    Jim

    Having just completed a 5th step in this sobriety I think politics is it on top of my list. The key factor to my peace today is having let go and acceptance.

  11. Margo Avatar
    Margo

    Thank you for your wisdom, Jon G. Oh No! More stuff to think about. My brand of justice is probably not the same as another person’s so I find myself saying that old prayer: “Not my will but thine be done.” I hope to keep enough prayer and gratitude around me to recognize resentments – either that or I can just ask my daughter-in-law…Just kidding, Caro! Stay blessed and beautiful!

  12. Br. Buddha Avatar
    Br. Buddha

    Good morning everyone + happy Friday. Here is today’s thought. Sometimes I fail; sometimes I get resentful; sometimes I just loose it. But when this happens, I find a quiet place + ask God to help me. It’s so good to know that I can ALWAYS go back to God. So can you. Blessings. B

  13. Jon G. Avatar
    Jon G.

    This topic is particularly appropriate in my life right now because I am working on my fourth step and one resentment in particular is giving me a lot of gried and holding me back. Before I never realized how resentful I was or how much my resentments were holding me back. I did not pay head to the warning that resentments were the number one offender or that they killed more alcoholics then anything else–I thought alcohol killed more alcoholics then anything else. I now take resentments very seriously and am doing everything in my power to rid myself of them. I also now realized that forgiveness is huge and more importantly it is I who benefit when I forgive someone rather than the person I am forgiving. That being said, it can be a long journey from the head to the heart and I have a lot of room to grow in this area.

  14. Adam Avatar
    Adam

    An old friend strung out on meth told me to f*** off when I told him not to contact me any more. He doesn’t remember the $2000 I lent him to try to save his home. I am trying to forgive him. It isn’t the money itself but that he doesn’t even remember, and that he said that to me. And that he forced me to have to cut ties with him. I have to keep reminding myself that it is his addiction that did this and pray for him as Margot said she does.

  15. JB jr. Avatar
    JB jr.

    Its harder for me to hold resentments when I see everyone as “childs of God”. As children we are bound to be imperfect. And yet there is still something precious and infinitely valuable each of brings to the world.

  16. Margot E. Avatar
    Margot E.

    I consider myself a person who craves justice. But the key questions have become: justice for whom and justice at what cost? Thank God I am learning to pray for those against whom I nurture a grudge – a resentment. It is a miracle how soon a resentment can go away once I start praying for so much good stuff for others.

    1. Jon G. Avatar
      Jon G.

      Be careful about praying for justice. I always listed “just” as a trait I wanted my higher power to have when my sponsor suggested I make a list of all the traits I want my God to have. I now realize that I pray I don’t end up getting what I deserve and I now pray for grace not justice.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.